Wednesday, October 22, 2008

It was a tough week end

October 19th would have been Jerry and my 40th anniversary. I think that's a big deal. When you get married you expect to be together for the 40th. anniversary. Maybe not the 50th., but definitely the 40th. So it was kind of a rough week end. No one mentioned it - I don't know if they forgot or if they thought it would upset me to say anything. I'm leaning toward the not wanting to upset me. I know Shan pretty well and she doesn't forget anything. But it is nice to have some one acknowledge that day and let you know they know it's probably a tough day for you. I talked to my best friend, Dorothy, and she is having open heart surgery after the holidays so I will be going to Pittsburgh to be there for her surgery. She also told me her daughter, Dawn, found a lump under her arm. They have done a scan and found three other lumps. They did a biopsy on them and she won't know for about 5 days if they are malignant or not. It is scary though. They tried antibiotics and that didn't do anything so they don't think it's an infection. Please keep her in your prayers. After reading Dave's blog I felt a little guilty for not posting for a few days. Problem is sometimes there is not much going on and so not much to blog about. I think that means I am doing better as far as the grieving goes. The blog has become more of what I do in my life as opposed to how I am feeling since Jerry died. Do I miss him? You bet. Am I lonely? You bet. But I have moved past the just wanting to stay in bed and sleep. Saturdays are still hard for me, but not nearly as bad as they were. So forgive me if I don't post every day. It's not that I don't have the time...it's just sometimes I don't have anything worth writing. I have no idea how many people read my blog. I know of a few...Dave, Shan, Shari, and Michelle for sure, but others I don't know. So I mainly do this for me, not only to get things written, but sometimes to just let the people I know read my blog how I'm doing - what I'm doing and that I love them all very much!

Wednesday, October 15, 2008

It's official

You know walking around thinking you're crazy is a huge burden, finally got to the doc today and had it verified! Thank heavens I really am crazy. What a weight has been lifted from my shoulders. Now I have a professional's okay to keep doing all the things I've been doing! WHEW! I was really worried that I would have to learn how to act normal - now I don't. So yea for me! Just keep those drugs a comin'. I highly recommend crazy to any of you out there that might be thinking of joining me. It truly is a great place to be. So, I think I will go do something wild and crazy just for the heck of it and because I can!!! Take care ya'all. And check out the new pics Dave downloaded for me!!!

Saturday, October 11, 2008

It's been a while

I didn't realize it had been so long since I posted.Brian and Carla are doing well in the RV. They love it and said it seems like they are on vacation every day. Went to the Gastro guy on Thursday. Changed my meds. I feel better, but the new meds don't seem to be doing what they should soooo have to wait and see. Tyler stayed with me last night while Dave, Shan and Emily went to Wal-Mart - he usually does - I love hanging out with him and talking. Like most 13 year olds he doesn't have much to say, but last night he was chatty and we talked for a while. When Dave and Brian were young we had some great dinner conversations. Nothing was ever out of bounds for us. We talked about anything and everything. I miss those times so it was great talking to Tyler last night. I hope I'm around long enough to get to have that kind of time with Emily. Today went and had my eyes checked - it's been 5 years - so needless to say my eyes have changed. So went and picked out new glasses. While that was being done I went to Wal-Mart for groceries, then back to get glasses. Stopped in Hope for a car wash, gas, and a new battery for my watch. Back in Prescott stopped at the Sonic and got lunch for Shan, Dave, and me. The kids were up town with Kay at the Fall Festival. Hung out at Dave and Shan's for a while, came home, put the groceries away, cleaned the house (well, really gave it a quick once over) did some laundry, talked to Dorothy, watched all the shows I tape during the week - no commercials that way LOVE IT!!!, took a shower, and here I am. Just typing all that makes my tired! Got a really nice card from Bill and Patty today. They sent me a check to help pay for my plane ticket when I go to Pittsburgh for Dorothy's open heart surgery sometime late this month or early next. That was sweet of them, but I know Bill has taken a huge hit on his 401K with all this money stuff going on and really doesn't need to be sending me money. I called and left them a message telling them that, but I love them for the thought! Great to have such a wonderful family here and there!!! I love you all. So that's it for now. Haven't been to therapy in about 2 months. Think I will call her and see when I can get in, just to check in and make sure I'm still crazy. I know I am I just like to have it verified by a professional, if ya know what I mean!