Okay - maybe my brother wasn't adopted

My brother, Bill, called me tonight to make sure I was okay. He knew how much of a McCain supporter I am. We talked for over an hour about several things. Of course the election was the big topic. Bill was thoughtful, concerned, and funny. He always makes me laugh and I always feel better after I talk to him. So I'm thinking maybe he wasn't adopted after all. As we talked I could hear our mother saying the same things he was saying. My mother didn't play - she spoke her mind no matter what, but she was also one of the most accepting individuals I knew. She never saw color, religion, or status of anyone. She treated everyone the same - which some of the time was not so great, at least with us kids. Bill and I talked tonight about a lady Mom worked with. Her name was Kix. She was black and worked as a cook where our mother worked as a waitress. There were many times when Mom would ride Kix home from work, now take into account this was probably 50 years ago and things were very different then. Any way, the first time she offered Kix a ride home Kix asked Mom if she should ride in the back. Our mom looked at her like she was crazy. Why in the world would she ride in the back when there was a perfectly good seat in the front and it was just Mom and Kix in the car. Kix felt that her status was lower than Mom's and didn't want to seem "uppity" as they used to say. Mom would have none of it. Kix was riding in the front with her and that was all there was to it. She always gave ya a fair shot. Now if you screwed up that was the end of you as far as she was concerned. Mom went 5 years without talking to our aunt that lived right next door to us. All over an argument they had about my cousin and me. My cousin and I had gotten into a fight about some dumb thing. My mom thought I was right and my aunt thought my cousin was right. Well that was the end of the conversation between the two of them for the next 5 years. It would have gone on longer, but my aunt came to the back door one day, opened it and threw in a hat. There was an old saying back then that if you had a fight with someone and threw your hat in their house and the hat didn't come back out then it was okay to go in and the fight was over. And so the fight was over. Mom didn't through the hat back. But that was the kind of person Mom was and I think there is a lot of her in my brother. So since I am the kind of person that will tell you how the watch is made if you ask me the time, I have taken all these words to say Bill is not adopted, he is really my brother and I love him.

SHHHH I think my brother was adopted!!!

Since the primaries were decided and it was going to McCain and Obama my brother and I have been inundating one another with our points of view. Which to my surprise are total opposites. And just to set the record straight I really inundate him and he simply replies. But in reading his reply I can just see his blood boiling and him pounding away on that key board. He is an Obama man and I am solidly for McCain. So to say we have had some heated emails flying back and forth is putting it mildly. I don't know where he came up with some of his ideas, he wasn't raised that way so the only thing I can figure is he was adopted and this was instilled in him before he came to live with us. I'm not like him, my sister is not like him, my mother and father were certainly not like him so he must have been adopted. That is the only explanation there can possible be for him to be so 180 degrees from the rest of the family. So my quest now is to hunt down - err I mean find his natural parents and bury them up to their heads in sand. I don't know what else to do. I have to save my brother. I may be too late for this election, but hopefully I can find his parents and get this fixed before the next election - if we live that long and if there is a country left for us to fight for. So I need all my readers help. Go out to all the voting places. Find the people that are voting for Obama and ask them if they gave a boy child up for adoption 50 years age. Then turn them over to the authorities for child abuse. Because what they did to my brother should be against the law. I thank you all in advance for all the help I know I will receive from you. I need to stop my real parents and grandparents from spinning in their graves, because trust me they are!!! Love to all and Go McCain!!!

I miss you, Dad

It is 10 years ago today that we buried my dad. He was coming home from the nursing home after spending the day with Mom. He thought he could make it and pulled out in front of a truck. He was wrong. The truck T-Boned his car. He lived in ICU for one week. The night he died we were all there. Bill, Patty, Shari, Nick, Jerry and I. I will tell you it was one of the worst nights of my life, but I would not change it for anything in the world. Once we decided to stop all the heroic attempts I got to stand at his beside and talk in his ear until the end came. I got to say all the things you wish you could say to a person that dies and you're not there, He was the kindest, most gentle man there ever was. I miss him as much today as I did back then. I love you, Dad, and wherever you are I hope you are happier than you ever were. I hope there is no pain or sorrow. Only happiness and joy and you and Mum are together again! I love you, Dad, and always will with every breath I take and every beat of my heart. - Darlene

Finally - maybe a little good news

Those of you that ready my blog know that my best friend's daughter had discovered many lumps under her arm. We were so afraid it was cancer. Turns out the doctor think she has contracted STAPH infection - MRSA. Which is very hard to cure and will take massive amounts of high power antibiotics. So was have some peace of mind there. And you all know the election is only a few days away. I have early voted and I don't mind telling people it was McCain I voted for. My brother and I have had some interesting conversations about this election. He's an Obama guy. I have found there are a few people for Obama that I would have bet money on they would be McCain supports. Goes to show ya, you don't always know people like you think you do. Especially in politics. Well, my Emily had a big week. The had PC the patrol car for a drug awareness program for the kids, in the Honor Roll she got every award they had, making the honor roll, good citizen, and making her goal for reading!. Then on Friday the kids got to see all the teachers that had dressed up for Halloween, and finally she went in a huge limo for a ride to Pizza Hut for lunch for selling 20 items during a fund raiser. The girl is busy! And now that Halloween is over you all know - sorry to say it - Christmas will be before we know it. My best friend, Dorothy is going to have her open heart surgery after the holidays so I will be heading North then. Keep her and our country in your prayers. I hope we are going in the right direction.

It was a tough week end

October 19th would have been Jerry and my 40th anniversary. I think that's a big deal. When you get married you expect to be together for the 40th. anniversary. Maybe not the 50th., but definitely the 40th. So it was kind of a rough week end. No one mentioned it - I don't know if they forgot or if they thought it would upset me to say anything. I'm leaning toward the not wanting to upset me. I know Shan pretty well and she doesn't forget anything. But it is nice to have some one acknowledge that day and let you know they know it's probably a tough day for you. I talked to my best friend, Dorothy, and she is having open heart surgery after the holidays so I will be going to Pittsburgh to be there for her surgery. She also told me her daughter, Dawn, found a lump under her arm. They have done a scan and found three other lumps. They did a biopsy on them and she won't know for about 5 days if they are malignant or not. It is scary though. They tried antibiotics and that didn't do anything so they don't think it's an infection. Please keep her in your prayers. After reading Dave's blog I felt a little guilty for not posting for a few days. Problem is sometimes there is not much going on and so not much to blog about. I think that means I am doing better as far as the grieving goes. The blog has become more of what I do in my life as opposed to how I am feeling since Jerry died. Do I miss him? You bet. Am I lonely? You bet. But I have moved past the just wanting to stay in bed and sleep. Saturdays are still hard for me, but not nearly as bad as they were. So forgive me if I don't post every day. It's not that I don't have the time...it's just sometimes I don't have anything worth writing. I have no idea how many people read my blog. I know of a few...Dave, Shan, Shari, and Michelle for sure, but others I don't know. So I mainly do this for me, not only to get things written, but sometimes to just let the people I know read my blog how I'm doing - what I'm doing and that I love them all very much!

It's official

You know walking around thinking you're crazy is a huge burden, finally got to the doc today and had it verified! Thank heavens I really am crazy. What a weight has been lifted from my shoulders. Now I have a professional's okay to keep doing all the things I've been doing! WHEW! I was really worried that I would have to learn how to act normal - now I don't. So yea for me! Just keep those drugs a comin'. I highly recommend crazy to any of you out there that might be thinking of joining me. It truly is a great place to be. So, I think I will go do something wild and crazy just for the heck of it and because I can!!! Take care ya'all. And check out the new pics Dave downloaded for me!!!

It's been a while

I didn't realize it had been so long since I posted.Brian and Carla are doing well in the RV. They love it and said it seems like they are on vacation every day. Went to the Gastro guy on Thursday. Changed my meds. I feel better, but the new meds don't seem to be doing what they should soooo have to wait and see. Tyler stayed with me last night while Dave, Shan and Emily went to Wal-Mart - he usually does - I love hanging out with him and talking. Like most 13 year olds he doesn't have much to say, but last night he was chatty and we talked for a while. When Dave and Brian were young we had some great dinner conversations. Nothing was ever out of bounds for us. We talked about anything and everything. I miss those times so it was great talking to Tyler last night. I hope I'm around long enough to get to have that kind of time with Emily. Today went and had my eyes checked - it's been 5 years - so needless to say my eyes have changed. So went and picked out new glasses. While that was being done I went to Wal-Mart for groceries, then back to get glasses. Stopped in Hope for a car wash, gas, and a new battery for my watch. Back in Prescott stopped at the Sonic and got lunch for Shan, Dave, and me. The kids were up town with Kay at the Fall Festival. Hung out at Dave and Shan's for a while, came home, put the groceries away, cleaned the house (well, really gave it a quick once over) did some laundry, talked to Dorothy, watched all the shows I tape during the week - no commercials that way LOVE IT!!!, took a shower, and here I am. Just typing all that makes my tired! Got a really nice card from Bill and Patty today. They sent me a check to help pay for my plane ticket when I go to Pittsburgh for Dorothy's open heart surgery sometime late this month or early next. That was sweet of them, but I know Bill has taken a huge hit on his 401K with all this money stuff going on and really doesn't need to be sending me money. I called and left them a message telling them that, but I love them for the thought! Great to have such a wonderful family here and there!!! I love you all. So that's it for now. Haven't been to therapy in about 2 months. Think I will call her and see when I can get in, just to check in and make sure I'm still crazy. I know I am I just like to have it verified by a professional, if ya know what I mean!